Well, this is then.
I wanted to make a long post thanking each and every single one of you, but I found that I couldn’t. Because you’re all too fantastic, too beautiful to put into a small message to each of you and I was terrified of forgetting one.
So here’s my message for you guys for the next few months instead:
I love you. I love this website. You guys have been more than strangers on the internet. You’ve been my support, my fanbase, my friends, my family at times. You taught me so much and brought so much into my life.
Thanks to you guys, I discovered so many things. I started watching Doctor Who, reading ASOIAF more seriously, listened to loads of music you introduced me to, got a hold of loads of show I don’t watch properly but still care about and made friends. I loved getting more in Martha and River’s characters and falling in love with them, and defending them and praising them to hell and back with a community which adored them as well. I loved sharing the entirety of the Mass Effect experience with you, cry as you did and working with you to get our ending back. I loved talking about ships, characters, writers, and universes. I am eternally grateful to the people who opened my eyes on my privilege and the ambient/internalized crap I’ve had for such a long time, and for sharing their painful experiences with me, so I could understand and try to help.
You guys made me a better person. A more passionate one as well. When I felt bad, you were there. When I lost someone, you told me you cared. When I yelled at the world about my anger and frustration, you stood alongside me and yelled with me. When I cried, you wiped away my tears. When I was elated, you all cheered and supported me. When I felt hopeful, you encouraged me. When I did something wrong, you told me how wrong I was and made me see. When I felt alone, you panned along and started chatting about things people in my life don’t care about or don’t want to talk about, even when I do, so badly.
I’m terribly sad, but I have to make this decision, for my future and my life. But it doesn’t mean I’m forgetting you guys. I’m keeping this blog. And I’ll be back in June/July, to talk and be passionate again.
I love you guys. You are such an important part of my life and you’ve helped me through so much. This website isn’t just strangers on the internet. It’s a community, with its good and bad sides. And the bad was definitely worth the good.
Good luck to each and everyone one of you. Whether in work, love, study, life, problems, fandom, or anything, I wish you the best and I will definitely be keeping contact with you guys on skype and other platforms that are less time consuming. And I want you to know that I love you. I really do. You are all beautiful, fantastic, brilliant, incredible, fabulous human beings, no matter what you tell yourselves. You really are. Keep up the fandom passion and the determination in pursuing social justice, don’t explode when the rest of Series 7 airs, try not to break down when the last piece of Mass Effect DLC goes online. I’m with you in spirit.
I, meanwhile, step forwards in the next few months with Martha’s strength, River’s determination, Ashley’s attitude, Eleven’s optimism, Garrus’ snark, Shepard’s badassery, Kitty’s stubborness and your memory and friendship in my heart. Now, with the bac in sight and a new found love in my life, I’m ready to tackle this, and it’s only thanks to you guys. You and your passion.
Goodbye everyone. Until June 25th. I love you. God bless and keep you.
— Sylvie (Sis’)